#28 - i hate myself

i hate myself.


plus i'm getting fatter here in the philippines.

boo.

#27 - boracay

eff my life.

i'm in boracay. the one spot i was truly excited to go to during my vacation to the philippines...and i'm SICK. like quite sick.

i'm here with my family and family friends from the states and their whole extended family. it's fun with them...especially since boracay is better with a lot of people.
we went island hopping yesterday and did a bunch of activities. but i was sick. i felt like crap but i was really trying to push myself to have fun. i still succeeded. i had lots of fun doing everything.

especially helmet diving and fly fishing =]
fly fishing was the best. it's like that banana boat ride...but not lame. this thing actually goes up in the air and jumps up and down on the waves. it was really hard to hold on. i fell off once. and that's after being dragged in the water for like 30 feet.
it always looked cool to be dragged in the water in those action movies...but it actually kind of hurts a bit. and when i let go i face planted in the water and blacked out for like a couple seconds.
really fun though. i suggest people look into this fly fish activity.

but all the activities only left me exhausted and feeling like i was going to die at night. i was so tired. so dead. i didn't even go out for the night life. i knocked out.

i slept more today too because i wasn't feeling well again. -_- so much for my trip to boracay. i was supposed to go jet skiing but my body just wasn't feeling it. so i slept. -_-

then we switched hotels...so i'm here now blogging while waiting to see what we're doing tonight.

all that sleeping made me feel better now though. i'm ready to enjoy the boracay night life.

but damn. being sick in boracay sucks.

#26 - greetings from the philippines

ok. so philippines hasn't been TOO bad yet. i've only been here a few days. but it hasn't exactly been the time of my life which i was hoping it to be, but not expecting it to be. did some shopping. saw cousins. but i've been stuck in the hotel a couple days because my mom is buying furniture for her place in the province.

eff that.

i did not come to the philippines to buy freakin' furniture.
yet, here i am in the hotel blogging.

my vacation here better not be this crappy the whole time. my mom isn't going to hear the end of it if i have a crappy time here.

i had plans to have a fun summer in the US. not the philippines. so plans were ruined.

i'm going to boracay tomorrow.
i hope i have a fun time there. like a REALLY fun time. as in i don't want to leave.

i'm missing the vegas trip with last year's PCN board this weekend. it was supposed to be earlier this summer, but they postponed it...to a date that i can't go. but everyone else seems to be going.
i just turned 21. i wanna effing go to vegas. i feel like i might not even get to go this summer to vegas.

if everyone has a BLAST in vegas this weekend, and i have a crappy time...i'm going to kill myself. i swear i will.
that will suck.

i hope everyone has fun still though. lots of fun. getting wasted and what not.
i just hope i'm not totally missing out and have my own fun in boracay.
if not...then fuck.
i just wish i wasn't missing vegas. especially since i'm not even sure i'll be going this summer.

ok..well...
boracay is coming soon.
it's sad that i'm inside blogging while i'm in the philippines.
if my mom is going to boring and shit...the i'm going to make sure i have a fun time.
she doesn't want me drinking.
i'll come home drunk if i want if i get frustrated over this vacation.

let's hope she has more fun planned in this month-long vacation...

#25 - awsome 21st

i guess i was wrong about how i thought my 21st was going to be like.
this was a good birthday compared to others i've had. i actually DID something.

sunday was the party. that was a lot of fun.
wednesday was my actual birthday.

thought i was going to be bored and lonely. woke up to playing restaurant city and farm town.
ended up playing ball later. and kyrstin called some friends up for late notice dinner...which was all good. all the usual people i see were there. well, most of them. i guess it was at that dinner at TGI Friday where it kind of clicked that i turned 21.

bought my first drink legally. had dinner with friends.
good time to spend with some of the people before i headed off to the philippines.
afterwards was beer pong and keg stand time with some of the bros at brother fernando's house. that was chill, too. haven't really seen my bros or hung out with them for a while.

i was happy at the end of the night. like actually happy and kind of sad that my day was ending.
i don't remember feeling like that about ANY day in years.

but it's over now. but i had fun.
good times hanging out with people before philippines.

next thing to do is actually go on that 4 week trip to the philippines that i've been dreading. i'm going to miss out on so much here in the states. hope i enjoy it there though, even though i don't know what i'm going to be doing for 4 weeks.

i leave tonight. midnight
as in...july3-4 midnight.

but yea. thanks to everyone involved in my birthday celebratoins for a great 21st. really mean it this time. not just saying it to be polite.

for those not involved...whatever. i never really expected anything for my birthday anyways. just been that blah the last few years...

#24 - 21st

it is my birthday today. it's all good. no need to be celebrating it right now. i did that on sunday with a party. that was pretty crackin'.

to be honest, i haven't really been excited for my birthdays for past few years. it's just been whatever to me. i guess i'm a little more excited this year because i'm actually having a party and i'm finally turning the legal age to drink. not even because it's MY BIRTHDAY...but because i can buy drinks now and i think is cool.

it's nice to be greeted "happy birthday" and everything...but i don't know...if anything, this day just makes me feel more sad than regular days for some odd reason. i never really expect anythign for my birthday. no need to.
it's just a regular day. i just happen to be born on that day. it's not like the day was made for me.

but still. this year it was fun. party was fun. really fun. glad people enjoyed.
i'm 21 now. big TWO-ONE. yay i guess?
i don't know. i'm still just whatevers.
i'll see how this day goes. and maybe my outlook on my birthday may change...or maybe it won't and it'll still be just a whatever day.

i've always been made to believe that birthdays are so great with a lot of wonderful things happening for the celebrant.
but it's never like that for me.
maybe that's why i'm pretty indifferent about it.

#23 - cute girl

yeah man.

that girl was cute =]

i smiled.

#22 - FWD: Miracle Texting

so i recently received a text from a friend.

it said: "Fwd: FWD: Fwd: FWD: Fwd: Msg: *Please Do This* God plans to give you a miracle in one week, but you must forward it to then people including me!"


i've received tons of these before.
sorry, but...i don't believe in miracles.
and if they do really happen. they don't happen for me. i'm not that fortunate.


so...i didn't send the text to anyone.
wast of my time.